Well, Shut my mouth!

The children and I were just remembering one of our favorite restaurants in all of Beijing.  There is a wonderful little park, Ritan Park, not too far from the homes of many embassy dignitaries.  The park is situated in the center of the city block, surrounded by businesses on the perimeter.  To enter, one must go through circular doors which open into the beautiful courtyard-like park.  This restaurant that we love is one of the surrounding businesses.  It has been in operation for more than 200 years, I'm told.  The building used to be the home of someone very famous and wealthy, so it is what you would imagine a Chinese mansion to be...carved doorways and windows, lacquered and painted beams and ceilings, rounded archway entrances, courtyards and koi ponds.  It is a beautiful place, and the food is outstanding.  It is very expensive by Chinese standards, but because the embassies are nearby, the cost is fitting for the setting.  (It is only about as expensive as an American family restaurant, but that is outrageous in China.)

I first went there with a South African friend of mine.  She had found the restaurant when someone else took her there.  Word of mouth was the only advertising needed to sustain this business.  My friend showed me a few dishes that she and her family enjoyed, and I was dumbfounded as the food began almost immediately to appear at our table.  In typical Chinese fashion, we dove right in.  She was right.  The food was exquisite.  As I reached my chopsticks out for a bit of a chicken dish that had just been brought to us, she warned me, "Don't eat the peppercorns."  I tried to avoid the round bits scattered throughout my food, but eventually, one of them made it past my lips.  The result is kind of hard to describe, and the only thing I can compare it to is when I was three and some neighborhood kids gave me an unripe persimmon to eat.  But this was magnified!  Not only were the peppercorns (and we're only assuming that's what they are) bitter and spicy, they also seemed to wring out all moisture from the mouth.  Additionally, my tongue and lips became quite numb.  I could no longer feel or taste my food.  It was weird....but the minute I gained control of my mouth again, I dove back in...it was that good. 

The meal was astounding...crispy fried green beans, this amazing chicken dish, walnut shrimp, sauteed young pea greens, honeyed sweet potatoes... We went back time and again.  Every time, at least one of us would manage to get one of the peppercorns in our mouth.  You'd think we would learn our lesson and proceed with caution, but we just kept making the same mistakes.  If you eat enough of this dish, you're bound to get in a peppercorn or two.

Proverbs 10:19 tells us that "when words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise."  Isn't this the truth?  The more talk we do, the more relaxed we become, and the more relaxed we become, the more we let down our guard and speak foolishly.  Sometimes we say things only to spice up an otherwise dull conversation.  But is there a need for that?  I understand the need to talk.  But I also understand the wisdom behind considering each word before it's spoken.  When I think of all the trouble that my tongue has managed to get me into, it's shameful!  I never leave my house intending to dig myself into holes, but it happens frequently enough...I say something that should be left unsaid...I fuss at my husband or children over things that are trivial...I let a thing escape before God's timing has ordained it... My tongue is my least favorite thing about me.  I am working on this constantly with the help of the Holy Spirit.

Truly, I wish that there were some sort of "peppercorn effect"...that my lips would become numb the moment before I'm about to say something harmful.  But it just isn't so.  A very wise professor told us once that it is God's part in responsibility to give us the wisdom that we need; it is our part to walk out the discipline of it.  God will never silence my mouth.  That is my own job.  I am the one who should be disciplined enough to know when to speak and when to be quiet.  Being disciplined is simply a matter of being discipled.  If I rely solely on my own discretion, I will never get it right.  When I put my words under the counsel of the Holy Spirit, then I am much more likely to get things right. 

If we are yielding our lives to the workings of the grace of God, He will provide the wisdom that is needed to keep us from sin.  It is not an instant thing.  Discipleship takes time.  In fact, it takes a lifetime.  These days, I make fewer and fewer mistakes when I'm in conversation.  These days, I'm much more likely to submit my thoughts to the Lord before they become actual words that escape my lips.  I'm not perfect, and I could use a peppercorn or two from time to time, but I am getting better! 

I would really love to be in Ritan Park today.  I would love to go to our favorite Chinese restaurant and enjoy a feast.  It just won't be happening, though.  But...I do have an idea for supper!...